I’m thinking that there are many of you wondering wtf I’m doing …or if, in fact, I’m actually doing anything anymore; it’s as if I’ve disappeared, or at least my writing has.

I’m still here.

Sometimes regular life is more important than aspirations.

I’m spending the summer with Wendy Jr. (which I love! we are such goofballs) and I am still doing classwork for my counselling certification and I have some other things I’m gearing up for that I’ll let you in on.

I don’t work well without some sort of organization…. time organization. If I don’t have a time set aside for something to be done or some sort of framing for the work in general, it is merely a wish to me.

Wishes are nice and all, but I’ve been through a lot in this little life of mine and have wished a lot of things; none of which ever amount to much because they weren’t ever important enough, I suppose.

I don’t like anything on my back burner that isn’t cooking. If it’s not cooking, then it’s just a dirty pan I notice every so often. Clean it and put it away then I don’t notice it and can pay attention to the things that *are* cooking. If it’s not important enough to be actively cooking, it isn’t time for it to be on the stove.

I appreciate ‘Bucket Lists’. I think they are fun and perhaps can help put things on a schedule to be accomplished. But, for me, “before I die” isn’t a serious time frame for doing something (…you gonna do it AFTER you die?..)

With that insight to my crooked way of thinking, I can tell you that August is going to be a fun month for me; fun in a very challenging way. I am going to do what I call my “August notebooks”. I am going to write down everything: what I am doing, what I’m eating, what I am listening to, watching, everything; and what my thoughts are about those things. For 31 days, I’ve challenged myself to pay attention….to everything and document it.

I write notes to myself all the time. Sometimes its the only way I can clear my head to do something else. My hope is to clear the way for other things; new, better, odder..if that’s possible, and to learn to notice the un-noticed, the hidden, the treasures.

I also have the beginnings of a novel, some written down; mostly in my head. I have been working on how I can block out time to write exclusively for that. That, too, will begin on Sunday. Goal: 1500 words per day. That’s a lot, I know, but goals are goals and wishes are wishes.

So that’s what I’ve been doing: prep work for August. The month I will make my own.

What have you been up to?