June 2010
20 posts
1 tag
Operation Lard Bucket | Day 27
87 days to go.
I didn’t want any of you to think I was a quitter. I have not quit. I have been a bit of a slacker at keeping up with these posts. Lots of changes around here lately and I’ve found myself trying to find the balance again. I’ll try to be more diligent. We were all sick here the past few days and that doesn’t help matters. But balance will come.
I ignored...
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What I'm Thinking | Tuesday 6.29.10 am
When I read things like this it makes me sick to my stomach at how these people we elect to represent us have fucked it up.
The article states that “New York State Board of Regents, the governing body that overseas education in the state, has…canceled the teaching of history in grades K-8.” And that “student knowledge of history and their use of analytical skills and...
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Arts and Crafts | Journals
An actor practices and hones their craft of creating emotion where there is none; creating entire characters from words on a page; becoming something they are not and yet pieces of themselves show through their work.
Writers need to hone their craft too. Writing exercises help us think outside the normal boundaries we set for ourselves; sometimes even extending those boundaries.
You can find...
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Souvenirs | The Bridges You Cross Today c.1998
The bridges you cross today
pave the roads you walk
tomorrow.
The decisions you make
are the baggage you take
on the road.
You’ve got more to lose
in the things you choose
than in all your good intentions
And the sky at night
has enough light
to carry its own load.
Wendy c.1998
Yesterday while cleaning up some things and organizing others I came across a lot of...
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What I'm Thinking | Saturday 6.26.10 am
I read everything. Ok, maybe not everything, but I read a lot. It is an eclectic card catalog of books I’ve read. Mostly non-fiction, I have a never ending appetite for learning. I have been this way as long as I can remember. As a child, I actually liked school. There were times things were difficult to learn, but mostly those things weren’t interesting to me in the first place.
I...
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What I'm Thinking | Tuesday 6.22.10 am
Do you ever think that we are entirely too afraid and angry all the time? We flit from one problem to another no matter the part of our life it affects. Sometimes political, sometimes environmental, sometimes personal and sometimes we make a pretty braid of the three so it’s blurred as to which is which.
We blame the IRS for wanting taxes we know we have to pay. We blame the credit card...
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What I'm Thinking | Saturday 6.19.10 am
You have any tattoos? I do. Two. Tats are funny things. People get them for such a myriad of reasons; some are ‘what-the-hell’ moments and some are thought-out, purposeful memories.
Some people have no desire to get a tat, ever. Perhaps it’s the thought of the pain, or perhaps they have beliefs that make it undesirable, or maybe they just don’t like how they look. There...
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Operation Lard Bucket | Day 12
102 days to goal.
Holy moly! (again.. I really need a new phrase) Life is full! My cup runneth over! ..all that shit. I got busy there for a few days and didn’t get much exercise in and I felt it! Kelly arrived on Saturday and we had a great, but full, weekend. Getting her settled in has taken some of my time and just plain being together was much more important than any damn exercise!
I...
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What I'm Thinking | Wednesday 6.16.10 am
It is never too late to be who you might have been. ~George Eliot
I love that quote. I have it on a bookmark that goes from book to book as I read.
Do you ever read something like that and understand that the meaning is great but never really feel it? I’ve had that bookmark for years. I understood the meaning right away and felt it must be true, but I never felt it inside me; like it...
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Operation Lard Bucket | Day 10
104 Days to Goal.
Holy moly I feel like I’m busy and I hate that feeling.
I lived with anxiety for years, having the occasional anxiety attack complete with tachycardia and thinking I’d never be able to control it. I refuse to take pills for ailments of this sort; I’m not going to drug myself into submission. I will take the occasional pain killer or anti-biotic or cold meds...
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Operation Lard Bucket | Day 7
107 days to goal.
I have patellar tendonitis aka jumper’s knee. I’ve had it since I was a teenager. It doesn’t bother me very often, but when it does it feels like someone stabbed the side of my knee with an ice pick. Serious pain. No way can I even stand up when it’s like that. Thankfully, it is very seldom that it flares up and I am sure that this regular walking at the...
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What I'm Thinking | Thursday 6.10.10 am
Images of young, gorgeous, perfect-bodied, women in bikinis only make me think of one thing: a big ol’ pile of puppies.
You see a pile of puppies and think they are all cute. None are the same, but they all look adorable and you want one. Perhaps you want to take one home, or maybe just pick it up and hold it for a while, but we all have the urge to caress them. It gives us joy. However, all of...
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What I'm Thinking | Wednesday 6.9.10 pm
I remember when I was young if asked how I was or how my life was I would reply “I’m fine. I’m not in jail or in the hospital. So I’m fine.”
It makes me laugh a bit at how cocky I was with that response, but still, it seems I knew a thing or two more than even I give myself credit for.
It meant that if I were in either of those two places, jail or the hospital,...
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What I'm Thinking | Wednesday 6.9.10am
Clocks slay time… time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels; only when the clock stops does time come to life. ~William Faulkner
I stopped wearing a watch years ago; there are clocks everywhere, I sure don’t need to have one on my body reminding me time exists as if I could forget.
Days like today, when I feel unmotivated to be productive, I find myself...
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Operation Lard Bucket | Day 4
110 Days to goal.
Notice I changed the word ‘go’ to ‘goal’. I’m *going* now! My goal is something to attain. Choosing my words.
Yesterday was a great day. I did two miles at the track; walking with jogging intervals to keep my heart rate up. I only had a few dogs to walk so that was only another hour of walking. I did a simple yoga routine because I had to...
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What I'm Thinking | Tuesday 7.8.10 am
Yesterday, I posted two posts: one, I started the conversation that you become what you think about; the other was fat discussion. What appears as a contradiction isn’t. One is a character trait, one is a physical one. Let me clarify.
When we talk to ourselves, we do it wrongly. We aren’t truthful. We lie. We do it all the time. That is against the cardinal rule #1 of must remember rules:...
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What I'm Thinking | Monday 6.7.10 am
Last night Matt and I watched Revolutionary Road. There’s a scene where Kate Winslet is walking down the street or some such thing and she is wearing this yellow dress (I think) and I say out loud “I want to look like that”.
Now that I’ve thought about what I said, I know I didn’t exactly mean that. I meant I want a dress to fit me the way that dress fits her.
I...
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Operation Lard Bucket | Day 3
111 Days to go.
I did not a damn thing (exercising) this weekend. I have an excuse… a note from my feminine side, as it were. Add in terrific cramps and you get the picture. I never use ‘that time of the month’ as an excuse for anything; if I’m going to be snarky, I’m just going to be snarky, I don’t need an excuse. I try not to be that way ever anyway. So...
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What I'm Thinking | Friday 6.4.10 am
I remember my father calling my brother Dan a ‘lard bucket’. Dan wasn’t fat by any stretch of the word (He was over 6 foot tall and wore a 32” waist jeans). My father was referring to what he perceived as my brother’s laziness. He was a teenager. We were all that way then.
But what reminded me of that phrase, lard bucket, was a look in the mirror this morning. Not...
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What I'm Thinking | Thursday 6.3.10 am
I love how baseball emulates life. Shit happens. We are human. Mistakes are made. We don’t have to like it, but we do have to live with the results. Stomping your feet and yelling about what’s fair doesn’t get you anything and doesn’t change the results.
Live and learn.
So what are you beating yourself up over? What mistakes have you made that you have apologized for...